Monday, April 20, 2009

Kiss the Girls

I adore my bridesmaids, I do. I had a vision of what I wanted them to wear:
(image from theknot)

I wanted the look to be soft and romantic, to echo the vintage sensibility that emanates through most of the wedding decoration. None of the gals would wear the same dress as they are three different ladies, with three different body types and three different styles.

(image from perfect bound)

As much as I was trying to infuse a sense of the Boy and myself into every aspect of the wedding, I wanted our friends to be able to express themselves in their dress as well. Considering that none of them had the same taste in clothes, I figured that would be easy. I wanted each to pick something in a blueish gray tone or soft pinks or peaches because, though we’ve since decided NOT to declare wedding colors (see the mishap of the change in heart), these colors seemed prominent in the things I was choosing to include.

My only request (I guess, beside a general color scheme) was that it be something softer and lighter in overall feel. I loved the idea of hand stitched details, embroidery or ruffles, creative draping, and other fun little details that would add personality to an outfit. Because, after all, my friends were nothing if not characters in themselves. Why not showcase that at the wedding as well?

(image from snippet & ink)

When it came time to make my vision into reality, things did not prove to be so easy as I imagined. I was torn between my original ideas and the images that were staring at me every time I opened a bridal magazine or clicked on a wedding website. Can we say, visual stimulus overload?

One day, I would jump for joy thinking I had found the dresses the girls should wear. Since we all live in varying cities, I would email the links to the dresses I thought they could get for the wedding. I’d wait, hear back, they’d choose a dress…and then I’d change my minds. Or they’d present me with an idea of dresses they could wear, I’d like it, but ultimately I’d change my mind again as I didn’t feel it was really staying true to the nature of the vision I had in my mind’s eye of what I wanted the feel and look of my wedding to be.

Then it happened. Four attempts later (which included one brief dalliance with a series of Melissa Sweet dresses and only time constraints stopped us going forward with it), I found the dress. Or dresses, depending on how you look at it.

This was such a sweet dress from Anthropologie that I actually made the decision (and stuck to it) and had the maids purchase this dress. I was a little sad that they all ended up with the same dress, but lo and behold, it actually was the kind of dress that kit well on different body types (surprise surprise). And then my best friend and maid of honor came to the rescue! She remembered that I wanted each of them to look different (which is why I had wanted them in different dresses). One evening, bored and alone in her apartment to the north, she took the dress off the hanger and decided to play dress up. It was during this bout of silliness that she discovered that the sash was so long, one could tie it in any way across the body to create different looks. I was elated by the news and quickly emailed the others.

One MOH’s spring break, she came home for the week and we betook ourselves to all do all things wedding related. She checked out the venue for the ceremony (see previous post), we went to a wholesale flower shop and picked out flowers for the bouquets and centerpieces (I’ll have to post on that later), shopped for wedding shoes (I think I found them and must order them soon), got a mini makeup trial (uh, still need more work in this area) and then headed to Anthropologie and tried on the dress in real life.

She showed me the different was to tie the sash around to create a halter look

A Grecian goddess look,

Something a little more covered up on the top (though this would need a broach or something to keep it in place) (images by me)

And a variety of other ways (I liked some ideas better than others). Took pictures in the changing room (by the way, don’t you love the changing rooms there? I wish I had a closet area like that in my place!) and sent them along to everyone else. Each gal has decided on a way they are going to wear their dress (thank goodness, they picked different things), each with different accessories and jewelry, different hair and shoes and in general, the only thing that will be the same is that they all bought the same dress.

What do we learn from all of this?
1) It’s OK to procrastinate. You might get a few more gray hairs out of it but that’s half the fun.
2) Not everything will go the way you want it to.
3) Stop looking at so may wedding blogs. Be true to who you are and your vision because, after all, it’s YOUR wedding and no one else’s.
4) Compromise is a beautiful thing. I hope to keep this lesson close to my heart throughout all of our marriage.

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